Feelings Feelings Feelings

     A popular saying these days is a line talking about "being in your feelings". Meaning that you've just taken some time to soak in your feelings, usually ones of misery. We are a race that survives on our feelings, and it is such a dangerous thing to base your decisions and happiness on the feelings of a mere moment.
     I have always struggled with being a people pleaser. Not necessarily meaning that I kiss up to people, but meaning that I simply like to do the right thing, and help people out. This being said, I like to be noticed, appreciated, and complimented when I make an effort to make someone feel special. Who doesn't, right? But I have to be careful because a lot of times, it's how I get filled up. So when I go through times of feeling like I'm invisible and unnoticed, I am absolutely drained, because my feelings of being loved, and so on, are not being fulfilled.
     Something I have been learning of late, is that living off of our feelings is an action that is often tied with our relationship with God. Let me clarify. I am one of those people that when I worship God or get prayer over something, I cry, because I am just so moved. I have attached crying to the idea that God is working in my life, so when I don't cry, I feel as if nothing is happening. I have based my relationship with God on if I cry or not. How messed up is that??? I want to feel that God loves me. Why do I need to feel it? I should just know that God loves me, just by looking at the facts that he has placed before me in the Bible.
     Don't take this the wrong way. Feelings are a totally okay thing to have. God made us to have feelings. But like C.S. Lewis said, "Feelings come and go, and when they come a good use can be made of them: but they cannot be our regular spiritual diet." That's some wise words from one of the greatest theological writers of all time. Our spiritual diet should consist of God's word.
     We shouldn't need to be recognized by other people to lift our spirits. We should invest our hearts in the promises that God has given to us. That He loves us. That we are fearfully and wonderfully made. That in heaven there will be no tears. Ironic, huh? No tears. YIKES. Better get out of my feelings. You too. ;)


                                                                                      Love your friend, Jess

Lies

     Sometimes I hear lies that God doesn't care about me. That I am all on my own in this whole "life" thing. I've gone through so many seasons where I have battled with depression, and Satan takes the opportunity to plant more lies in my head. To tell me that I am unloved, that people just tolerate me, that no one is there for me, least of all God. It is hard to express in words the magnitude of the pain I have experienced. I'd lock myself away from the world, shut everyone out, and just soak in my feelings of rejection and loneliness. I wouldn't want to talk to God, my family, or even my friends. Every time that I would try to turn my back on everything I believed in, God was always right there by my side, even if I didn't feel like He was.
     I love the passage from Isaiah 40:28-31, and reading it in the message version (my favorite version) makes it so much more powerful (simply because it is an easy to understand version of the Bible). It is like a knock back to the reality of knowing the true character of God, not the lies that Satan feeds us. Here are the main points from this scripture:

1. God doesn’t come and go. God lasts.
2.  He’s Creator of all you can see or imagine. 
3. He doesn’t get tired out, doesn’t pause to catch his breath.
       And He knows everything, inside and out. 
4. He energizes those who get tired, gives fresh strength to dropouts. 
5. For even young people tire and drop out, young folk in their prime stumble and fall. 
6. But those who wait upon God get fresh strength, they spread their wings and soar like eagles
7.  They run and don’t get tired, they walk and don’t lag behind.

     God is not just some deity sitting on some sort of cloud throne. He is our heavenly Father. He does not forget us. He created us. He adores us, loves us, and cherishes us. He laughs when we laugh, He cries when we cry. He knows our every thought and desire. He is our number one fan. He is not against us, He is for us. Most importantly, He loved me and you so much that He gave His only Son as a sacrifice for our sins. He saved us from the death we deserve. How could I, or anybody for that matter, think that someone who goes through all that trouble to make sure that we will spend eternity with Him, doesn't love us? That's absolutely crazy! When I am at my weakest, He is patient with me. I mess up, oh gosh I mess up so much, and I make so many of the same mistakes, yet He still loves and forgives me. That is the ultimate form of love. Even when I try to live life my way, He sticks around, and lovingly reminds me why His plans are the best plans, even though I don't always see it. God will not forsake you. We forsake Him, and the times when I have turned my back on God have been the lowest points in my life. Yet time and time again, He welcomes me into His waiting arms. He's waiting for you too. What are you waiting for?